EFR 485: The Art of Health for Busy People - 12 Small Habits That Will Change Your Life for Good with MaryRuth Ghiyam

MaryRuth: Hi, I'm MaryRuth I am the founder and CEO of MaryRuth organics and the author of the new book Liquids till Lunch. Today on Ever Forward Radio, we spoke about how to execute your daily routine within a 24 hour period to help you move forward. And we also spoke about loss, and how the pain points in our life do help us move ever forward.

Chase: What would you say is your number one excuse for not adhering to your workout plan for not sticking to the nutritional protocol that you said you would to deviate from your diet to zig when you want it to zag? What is it? Let's be really, really honest here. For me, the first thing that comes top of mind is I'm just so busy. My work gets ahead of me, life gets ahead of me, my personal interests and wants get ahead of me, my family needs get ahead of me. Now, I'm not saying that any of these are valid or invalid. But I think they are pretty realistic reasons as to why maybe I'm not sticking to the plan that I set out for myself most days now. I'm like you and I do everything I can to build habits and rituals and stack the conditions in my favor no matter where I am. But look, let's be honest, at the end of the day, we are human, sometimes things just happen. So how can we build a system that is going to serve us? How can we try to build a fail proof system? Well, that's exactly what today's guest MaryRuth Ghiyam has tried to do and is succeeding, I think in my opinion is succeeding very well and not only her personal health and wellness but for her family and for damn sure her thriving business, MaryRuth's organics. She is fresh off of her new book release, liquid still lunch 12 small habits that will change your life for good. And more importantly, this is the art of health for busy people. Now coming from New York City and being a health coach, much like myself, you know, day in day out, we used to just sit with people and try to help create ways maintain ways to adhere to workouts to adhere to nutrition programs, to lose weight, gain weight to just bring life and energy and vitality back into their daily routines. And her and I actually come through a few key ones from her book that stood out the most to me that have impacted my life the most and definitely were top of mind when I was thinking back to when I was in clinic, when I was working one on one with clients every day and day in and day out in person and online. And the things that I think you listening right now are going to find the most value in and can be reminded of or maybe visit for the first time to create in your own life. I'm not saying this needs to be your habit needs to be your routine. But MaryRuth's book and her nice conversation here are all about habits that will change your life for good. So take what you want, apply what works, apply what resonates with you, and then pay attention. No better coach in the world will ever tell you what to do then what your body is trying to tell us every single day. That's my personal belief system. biofeedback, how you feel higher performing thoughts, clarity, energy, vitality, excitement, just pause long enough to pay attention to what your body's telling you, and then go from there. Not only is MaryRuth, an incredible health coach and nutritionist, and wellness entrepreneur, she has created so many jobs and opportunities for everyone in her company. And in fact, she has bootstrapped she has dug deep into every ounce of energy and motivation that she could ever possibly think of to pull her company her family's company out of over a $700,000 deficit. That's right, you heard me, she was over $700,000 in debt. And not only does she bring her company back to life, but she has Well, she's made it made it prosper pretty damn well. So it is my privilege and honor to bring to you MaryRuth Ghiyam here on Ever Forward radio today. And in fact, if you want to learn more about her, MaryRuth's organics or her new book, Liquids till Lunch, or even want to check out the video interview, make sure to check the show notes. All the details are going to be down in the show notes for you to learn more about the show to learn more about MaryRuth, and everything that you could ever want from today's message. Thank you so much for tuning in. If you are not already, make sure you are tapping that subscribe or follow button on whichever podcast platform you're tuning in here today to make sure you never miss another episode. And if you enjoyed this one, and you think one other person in your life, just one person comes to mind that would find value and MaryRuth's message that you think would resonate with what she has to say, and would appreciate you sending some health and wellness vibes their way to help them create better habits that will change their life for good, then that's always the biggest things I could ever ask for just share this out with one person. Without further ado, here is MaryRuth Ghiyam on Ever Forward radio.

MaryRuth: What is interesting about that Chase is that I had worked with so many people in New York City who were career driven, had a lot of financial resources. But because they were so busy, they couldn't really find that perfect balance of I have all this financial resources, but I'm really career driven. How can I actually take care of myself? And so at first living in New York, some people say it's the capital of the world. You know, you've got access to cryotherapy chambers, ozone, infrared saunas, just regular infrared saunas, acupuncture, massage, float tanks, the finance people were always into flow tanks. But, you know, I mean, I'm sure you can relate just because you have access to something doesn't mean if you are really trying to work on your career that you have any time to do those things. So first, people would come to me for 12 sessions. And I would see them once a week in my office face to face health coach, right. Certified health educator, nutritional consultant and I would we would make suggestions, protocols, do this, do this, do this. And I started noticing a common theme these amazing people would come in. And every week, I'd be like, Okay, let's go over, like, how was that infrared sauna? How was the skin brushing? How is the rebounding, and they would say, Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't get to do any of those things. I was traveling, I had a deadline, I was working on a project and after kind of seeing that consistent pattern, I said, Okay, I got to change this completely. And so these protocols I did for them was 12 actions that they could do anywhere in the world. Okay, traveling deadlines, no deadlines. And I tried to just kind of be like, okay, where can you squeeze in these things? And then what's powerful about it is, it also works on the flip side, when you don't have access to financially do all of those things, you can still do these things. So brings like, both ends of the spectrum together. And that's also why I believe it's universal truth, because health should be accessible to everyone.

Chase: It should be and that's the big, you know, pie in the sky dream and certainly the goal of you know, platforms such as this, you know, we can have conversations and share these tangible, very easily applicable things that can yield just maybe once but definitely if you're consistent enough amazing results in your life physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, your relationships. As you were talking there, I was getting flashbacks to my health coaching practice as well. I was in Washington, DC and other very, very, very, you know, corporate career driven go, go, go structure and you know, people were very, very successful, like a lot of us can be, but then when it comes to the things that we know we're supposed to be doing or we've even agreed upon with a coach or a consultant of what we want to do what we're paying for what happens when you come back into the office. Oh, this happened, I didn't get to do that or part of this part of that. And it's just yeah, you have to have you have to create something new or else, I'm sure you can remember those patterns we just repeat. So what was the protocol that you created for people to be able to stick to their goals and see change, no matter how busy or how lucrative their position may be? Or, or the opposite?

MaryRuth: So I always talk about chronological order. So sometimes if you're not doing things in chronological order, then it's not sustainable probably won't last forever. 

Chase: or even like one kind of compounds on the other. 

MaryRuth: yes, exactly. Exactly. And also what you said about repetition. There's a few there's a few different concepts. One would be like healing through repetition. So to do the same thing, every day, over and over and over again, until the body becomes stronger the body heals. And I I'm sure you'll agree, Chase that, everybody knows what their weaknesses are, what their strengths are a little bit, a little bit. So I always encourage people, okay, here are 12 actions. Let's go where all the green lights are. So let's pick the tips that, yeah, you like to go outside 15 minutes every day in the sunshine without your sunglasses on. That just allows like the vitamin D to actually come into the body much better. You can put on the sunglasses after you've had 15 minutes of sunshine exposure. So we talk about chewing your food, Liquids till Lunch. 

Chase: You got you've got 12 incredible like they're all mapped out here in this book. And that sunlight one is actually very, very important. I've talked a lot on the show. Morning routine evening routine. Getting sun like sleep hygiene is for me has just has yielded so many benefits. And so I've had quite a few guests on to talk about those things. Can you go a little bit deeper for us there? This is number six. For anybody keeping track in the book, I get 15 minutes of direct sunshine each day. Vitamin D is crucial for the mind. And body. What is so unique about those 15 minutes what is going on? 

MaryRuth: So also, when I looked at your stories before we did the podcast, I was so surprised to see you out in the sunshine because it is not something you see a lot of people do. I think you were like holding some coffee. And you're like I'm outside getting sunshine and I'm like, Oh my gosh, did he read the book. But also like just from talking to you, I know that that's just something you were already doing in your routine. And so there are a lot of plants in this room. Plants do not survive without sunshine. And I think that it's so deeply connected for individuals that you can't really grow thrive, support your immune system, without sunshine. In the book, there's a lot of things about how 15 minutes of sunshine will counter act, the EMF, the electromagnetic chaos that comes from your iPad, your smartphone, your laptop, that is crazy. 

Chase: That's a new one. EMF is something that's been new on my radar. And I don't know if you saw it downstairs but actually have a similar Vedic device that is I'm gonna butcher the scientific term, but it's basically an anti EMF. And I keep it down on the main level where all my electronics are all the Wi Fi. Powerful. So that's, that's good to know. So that's not to steal your thunder. But I love how these little things like they actually spill over into each other. So you can be working on one thing, and it actually is benefiting another area of your wellness that you may or may not know, but it's 15 minutes to counteract such a powerful thing.

MaryRuth: and sunshine is free and accessible to everyone on the planet so. Everyone loves to go on vacation. We associate vacation, the beach, the sunshine, I feel so good, the oxygen, the salt, the water. But even with my team at my company, we talk about how can you if you know our team has like a 30 minute lunch break and 2-10 minute breaks. So I encourage people Hey, like you can take your 10 minute break outside because just the feeling of getting that sunshine can evoke on a daily basis, the same emotions of relaxation, anti-depression, anti-anxiety. And just to reiterate that thing, the thing I was speaking about before, was without the sunglasses for 15 minutes. I always say check with your doctor, of course. But just that going for a walk without the sunglasses consistently 365 days a year has a compound effect that you will absolutely be a different being a year from now. 

Chase: it is like a condensed evolutionary experience. 

MaryRuth: That's what's so powerful about it. It's not like you hear people say all but during the week, I'm on zoom calls, and on the weekend, then I'll go to the Palisades, or whatever. But it's the action of doing every single day, if possible, or building up to that cumulatively, one year from now, just taking one action, you will be different. You have so many things, it will break down walls for you just by Okay, All those actions, the sunshine one sounded the best for me.

Chase: It doesn't have to be complicated people, it just pick one thing that you can do consistently. And then, you know, measure the results. What does the data say if you track anything and but more portly, how do you feel like how are you showing up more in the day? And that's actually something that is new for me that relatively new, I'm always the guy wearing sunglasses, I've got light blue eyes, like you very light sensitive. And years ago, I had PRK eye surgery. It's like LASIK, but different. And so I'm much more light sensitive. But we had a guest on the show about this time last year, Matt Maruca, from ra optics, he runs this session called the light diet. And that was a big takeaway for me was actually the evolutionary change that can happen in a relatively short period of time, if you train your eyes to not only become less light sensitive, but what is actually doing in terms of vitamin D production photosynthesis, or not photosynthesis, excuse me, photosynthesizing, because that's one of the main direct ways that our bodies receive energy is through the lights. And so it wasn't comfortable for me, but I had to train myself, I know, I'm gonna get through this. And now I'm noticing a difference just a few months later, have a little bit less light sensitivity. And, you know, I feel like I'm not squinting as much. And so I'd be curious to see if it actually manifests in like a vision test or something.

MaryRuth: Yeah. And also, everything you said is so important. Because sometimes people have issues where they're like, Oh, it was uncomfortable. I didn't want to do it, and then you like, push through?

Chase: that is what we have to do. Right? So we have to do if we want to have a fair assessment. And another thing, do a smooth little segue here, you were mentioning about emotions. And when we're getting more sunlight and vitamin D stimulation, you know, it has an emotional carryover, which is another point in the book here about focusing on stressing less. Number 10; high stress means higher cortisol levels, which creates cellular damage and so here's another point of how focusing on sunshine can actually help with another point we're working on. So how can we work on stressing loss?

MaryRuth: what's amazing is that when there are so many things I can say on this topic, it's great. So everyone has a different viewpoint. So my viewpoints is, is one perspective. And then I feel like as you listen to podcasts, you read books, you hear more, you can add on to one tool that I've used to manage stress, and I've seen successfully really, really, really help people. So a lot of Okay, there's an expression I always use, which is called structure creates freedom. And that's based off of everything, and I think you love routines as well.

Chase: Yeah, it reminds me of Jocko Willink, he said discipline equals freedom, 

MaryRuth: it is the exact same concept. Everyone, everyone wants, this is just my interpretation. Everyone wants freedom to do the things that they love, and that make them happy. That's like, and to contribute to people around them, their communities. So going back to Chase, like what we’re speaking about earlier, chronological order. So if I could just walk you through chronologically, some of the things that lose lead up to this stress last concept, and what it could mean for each individual listening. Chronologically, the best place I could tell someone to start when they want to go on their health and wellness journey is to have awareness about themselves. This is so powerful to just and it's okay. A lot of people actually don't have awareness about what makes them happy, what do they enjoy, but just the action of being like, after listening this podcast with Chase, I'm going to sit for five minutes, and I'm going to think about what makes me really happy. What do I want to do for the next 10 15 20 years? And once you know, right, so some of the people listening already know, they have a lot of self-awareness. What makes them happy? What are they passionate about? Some people listening might not be completely sure. They might say, hey, five years ago, I really cared about this. Now I'm still doing the same thing not that passionate about anymore. How can I get out of that situation?

Chase: Great example, by the way, yeah, and oftentimes it doesn't have to be so future thinking but just look back on your life and see where the change has been.

MaryRuth: It's so this is the what I think is the very first step if a person has self-awareness about the macro, like the end goal, then all the micro is going to be very easy to execute manifest, create a routine and basically achieve like the micro and the macro are so deeply connected. I spoke earlier today about how sometimes people don't think like making a smoothie every morning is an action that can be deeply connected to getting out of debt, they are connected. And so when we're thinking about stress, a lot of times stress can come from, again, one, small perspective is my viewpoint, not the best time management. And so what you can do is kind of reverse engineer work backwards and then move forward ever forward. So in order to go ever forward, we need to go back for a second, which is literally to say, I'm always changing, I'm always fluid, I'm never stagnant. What used to make me happy might not make me happy again. Be like, okay, and all it takes is five minutes. Okay? At this moment in time, what, what do I want, then build a routine. So if you draw like a circle, and it says, my office with my clients so draw a circle, the circle represents this is my favorite, I would teach webinars, group classes, small group classes, live group classes, same thing every time, a nice big circle. And then I would say, Okay, here's 8am. Here's Liquids till Lunch, you know, and we take these 12 actions, we're like, okay, let's Oh, you like getting sunshine on your on your lunch break? Okay, let's put it right here. 15 minutes of sunshine on a lunch break. Okay, you eat at these anchor times you eat at 12, three, you ate at seven. Okay, let's, okay. So like I would make people map out, let's put all these little actions in their little 24 hour thing. Show them it's doable. So that is like, an amazing first step to manage all this stress all these emotions by saying, Okay, I know myself better than anybody else. I'm gonna make my own routine. I can't tell someone what their routine is, for sure I cannot. All I ever did for people was be like, here's your 24 hours. Greatest human denominator is we only all have 24 hours like how are you going to use this so that the end goal is like that structure will create that freedom. So let's say, you know, you put all the actions in or whatever you like, as well. That's where you're going to, you're going to get so much strength to carry out the daily routine, when emotions are not supporting the routine, like my four children under four, right? Last night, I slept for four hours. But what do I always go back to, I have this structure, I have this routine, it is always there for me, and it will move me ever forward, I will go back to it, I slept for hours, I will wake up I will do the routine. And it's always changing, right? Because your lifestyle is changing. Sometimes you're sick, sometimes you're this sometimes do that but let me execute it. It's never failed me before. It's I've changed it as I've grown. And then cumulatively, if you are executing a structure that you know will lead you to things that make you happy and have joy, then you already starting to reduce your stress. A lot of times people hit a mountain of stress because stuff doesn't go their way. And they have not created enough organization to handle literally every single day, so many things are going to not go our way. All the things literally. And it's so powerful to take it back. Take back the power. So I call call it like be the cause and not the effect. So the way that you are the cause and not the effect of your life meaning that the external things that happened to you, this lowers stress so much is the same way that someone would build self-esteem. 

Chase: Absolutely, I can see that.

MaryRuth: Oh my goodness, this is this is so powerful. Once you kind of break it down on paper for yourself, okay? Where does self-esteem come from? Self-esteem comes from a relationship that you have with yourself. You say I'm going to do this, I'm going to work out. I'm gonna make a smoothie. And then when you do one micro action, and you execute it, and you told yourself that you were going to do it, you break down that little wall because they're all little walls. You build cumulatively through perseverance, repetition, compound effect, so much self-esteem, but that self-esteem is a relationship with you that you know that no matter what happens, you're going to handle it. And that is so powerful. Because stress comes from a feeling of being out of control. I didn't do this deadline, I didn't do this, something happened something positive. We all have positive stress, I'm getting married, I'm having a baby. So many positive things happen to people, but it's the same thing, all that stress. But, but when you feel stress, kind of take back the power a little say, I'm going to be organized, I'm going to have my routine, I know it's going to lead. And even if you don't know the answer, something really bad happens to you, or someone you love by kind of executing the things, taking care of yourself sticking to that structure, will allow the answers to unfold. And one final thing, that's fun. Yeah, that's the big thing. Even when I was in so much debt, it's like, I don't know exactly how I'm gonna get out of this problem. But what I do know is if I take care of myself, and I execute, by executing the daily routine, you are moving forward.

Chase: absolutely forward every day. Sometimes, what's the quote, I always butcher this, but it's from one of my favorite books of all time in terms of productivity and goal setting the one thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. And they there's a phrase in there a concept, they talk about how sometimes it feels like you are failing. So slowly, it feels like success, like you don't quite realize what your what you're doing is actually deterring you from the goals. I actually love the opposite of that. Sometimes I think you are succeeding so slowly that it feels like failure. But to your point is like, if you just have one or two or three, whatever your stacks are of successful habits, things that you're doing to be the cause, then how can you fail? If each one of those in their own our successes, then it just may feel like failure may feel like you're not moving the needle? But like, take a look back? Take a look back at your life last week last year? 

MaryRuth: You like literally said exactly what I believe. That's the whole thing. Because if it's sustainable, if it's gonna last forever, if it's really, really impactful, and really important. So patience with the routine you are, you're definitely moving forward. And that's where it gets tricky. And I was sharing with you before the podcast, I said that quote, everyone overestimate what they can do in one year, and underestimate what they can do in 10. So 37, if I look back at 27, that 10 year period, it's crazy. But for sure, for 10 years, I feel like it's like almost like this was like the same movie. And then and then just one other closing thing about structure creates freedom is what's exciting is you want to do things that are fun and spur of the moment. And by being organized, when somebody says, hey, you do want to go to the beach right now. Because you kind of have a handle on your to do list or whatever, you can actually pivot and adapt. So I feel like I have a lot of structure. But I feel like I have the most freedom. And that's very hard to say, especially when you're a parent, you have four children under four, because I kind of really invest a lot in like, what's our routine, what are we trying to do, and I look forward to it, 

Chase: and you're running a business on top of all that. 

MaryRuth: it is really tricky. But I think that that's where the you know, because everyone wants, like, fly by the seat of your pants, I could do whatever I want. But you can and you can, you can have both you can have both.

Chase: I don't disagree, I don't disagree. And I love your whole concept. You're talking about the beginning of how you help people build the life that they want, around the life that they already have. And because it all already exists together. And that was some of the greatest breakthroughs I had and in my coaching practice as well was I there was two methods, it was either the inception method to where I just, you know, we help nudge the person to get to the idea that we really want to just like, do this do that you kind of just, you know, yell at them, like the answer is staring you in the face. But that's not going to be inherent for them. If it comes from their own idea and then you agree this person that you're mirroring back to then like boom that was inherent number one. But then two, it was the life that you want art exists in the life that you have. It's just what are you willing to carve out and protect in order to like, expand that, you know? And that's it just takes the excuses out of it. I love that whole 24 hour diagram I loved well, this is what you're doing. Okay, we're gonna implement these things in what you're already doing. Did you read Matthew McConaughey, green lights?

MaryRuth: No, but I saw all over Instagram. I saw that all over. 

Chase: you got to get the audio book. He reads it, he doesn’t just read it he acts it, I probably listened to it twice now. You got to it is hysterical. It's informative. 

MaryRuth: It's called green lights?

Chase: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I thought you were referring. Check it out for sure. So there's another point in here that I want to bring to the audience's attention before we kind of get into your backstory a little bit. Because what I love about so many people that I get the pleasure of meeting and having on the show here is, it's very rare in my experience that you just woke up one day and had this epiphany of, I'm going to change my life, I'm going to change the world. And I'm going to show people how to do it along the way. You had some health concerns going on you and your family. And so I would love to kind of get to that origin story a little bit. Before we do, I want to bring up one more. And that is number 12. And maybe this is just the LA in me been here for a couple years tapping into the woo, but I can tell you, the more and more that I have just kind of surrendered and let go to just the current of life, my spiritual self, God all the above, believing in a universal force of goodness. And even break it down here that it doesn't matter what you call that universal force God creator, it just matters that you believe that universe wants the best for you. Why is that so important? And why did this make the cut here? 

MaryRuth: So powerful and amazing question about why did this make the cut? So a lot of the book is about controlling, right? So, okay, I see, okay, let's control. But life doesn't work that way. Just because you're trying to control something does not mean that you will make it happen. 

Chase: Just because we have a plan doesn't mean that it's going to get executed all the time, or in accordance to our idea of what it's going to be.

MaryRuth: and so this last chapter is, is what I call like the frosting of the cupcake it is, it is this X Factor thing that can really take your mental health, I think, in your wellness to the next level. So right all the things we were kind of talking about before let's exercise, let's stretch, let's organize our pantry and our fridge, let's budget let's get out of debt, let's but also believing in a universal force of goodness, allows this perfect duality of also letting go. So it would be something like giving 100% involvement, hard work, but detached from the outcome. And the reason you do that let go at the end is because if you're into quantum theory, which I'll talk about in a second. You allow the universe to put things in your life and in your movie that you know, are moving you forward. And that's great because ever forward. The whole point is that even if you try to control everything, if you believe there's a universal force of goodness that allows every single thing to play out, I like to say from the seat of creation. So let's use examples that are like pretty intense. Let's say somebody has to go to jail. Right? Maybe they did something they shouldn't have done in business. They got in trouble for it. They have to go to jail. A lot of the pain that will come from the mental pain of that would be that. I think there's even was Iverson there's an amazing movie. I watched it on an airplane with a basketball player about how he had to go to jail. Because he got accused of starting a fight in a bowling alley. 

Chase: Allen Iverson. 

MaryRuth: Yes. In basketball, it became like the great. This is a better example than even the jail part. Because when I watched the movie, I'm like, yes, that's the universal force of goodness. It was literally like he had to go to jail. Everyone said that he had started this fight in a bowling alley. He absolutely did not start the fight in the bowling alley. There was even video footage that showed that he did not start the fight. He went to jail. This was before he was already so good at basketball. He was going to have like the greatest career. He calls his grandma he calls his grandma crying. I mean, who think about the pain you know you didn't do something now you're going to jail for it. Calls his grandmother and says literally, I would be okay with going to jail if I had actually done something, but he's talking to his grandma, but I didn't do something. And then she said, the universal force of goodness thing which is like and I don't want to make it about religion or God or not God but she said like God has put you through this process. You can't challenge the God or challenge the universal force of goodness puts every person through a very loving process that I do think in the end, none of that pain was in vain and that in the end, they become the greatest version of themselves. And so the story, I think it was Allen Iverson, the whole point is like, it's safe to say that he may not have become one of the greatest basketball players ever if he hadn't have had that thing where he went to jail. I know, I don't want to make it too specific. But it's very powerful that without that pain, we don't know what the desire would have been on the other end. And so it's a way to kind of accept and make peace with things that we can't control. Good or bad that happened to us. Every single day. It's very healing. If you can pause, stop something happens. And say, like, look, this is so uncomfortable right now, this is so painful. Which leads into a little bit of like my own story or even you losing your dad in 2005 it's the same kind of belief that since the creation, however, was supposed to play out. It all played out that way, you couldn't control it. But what you could do is through hard work, and perseverance, you can speed up the process of what is positive and what is going to happen in your life now.

Chase: it's all going to happen, regardless of what is your intention and action plan.

MaryRuth: And how much in your mind was extremely difficult, was extremely painful? Or was there a let go where you knew and you told yourself, I don't see it now at all from the dishwasher breaking to the smoke, smoke detector going off in the middle of the night, all the way to losing a loved one. I don't see it now. But I know that this is for the ultimate good. And even like if somebody, somebody, somebody steals like $10,000 from someone, right, that could be painful, someone breaks into your house, they steal everything from you. There's a lot of mental pain, like sure people think like, why should I lock the door? It's my fault. Why would I do this? I'm so what did I do wrong so hard on themselves. In every facet, people are so hard on themselves. But there is this quantum theory aspect where in that moment, instead of being hard on yourself, replaying it, you're fighting with a friend, you're having a disagreement with a spouse, instead of being hard on yourself, like, why did I say that? Now, I caused this problem now. It is more that all of the let go all of its playing out, as it should. How quickly can I recover? And learn from the lesson and move forward. It's all about moving forward. How fast is your bounce back so you can move forward? Ever forward.

Chase: What a great name for a show or something. So well said absolutely. And my audience has heard me talk about it many times. But I'll say quickly that I am now at a place 16-17 years later, of losing my dad, my biggest hero in life, that I am like, at peace and in gratitude for it. Because without that, I would not be here doing what I'm doing today. And I would not have this outlook on life. And I would not have for me its purpose, everything. Of course, we'd love for him to still be here. But it's just if you finally surrender, and I did years ago and still am. It's just like you realize, like, this is a part of the process. And so I'm either just gonna keep fighting the current, or I can learn to navigate it.

MaryRuth: Also, would you say that you feel your quality of life? For me, that was the biggest, biggest thing for me with losing my dad and my seventeen year old brother suddenly, was that it's not in vain, because my quality of life, like the appreciation I see, like with my children, I think my quality of life, I might not be like heart bursting but we're like, okay, yeah, we're all here together. But when you have that, I feel that I've really appreciated everyone around me so much.

Chase: And I'm sure that was, you know, for, you know, a few moments here. If we could kind of get into just the loss that you experience in the health scares that you and your family have had over the years, I'm sure was the catalyst for everything you're doing at MaryRuth’s and the book. And these incredible products and mission really that you're helping people change their life.

MaryRuth: Also, one question before I share how old were you when you lost your dad?

Chase: I was 19.

MaryRuth: That's really young. 

Chase: I was 19. I'm the oldest of three. My sister was 17. My brother was barely 14. So it impacted us all very differently. We're all very young. And yeah, I was 19 years old, I had just joined the army, I was away from home for about like a year and very, very interesting, formidable period of my life. 

MaryRuth: Also, there's a book called don’t let death ruin your life. And in the back of the book, there's a list of like, every scientist, every president, so many actors and actresses, so many entrepreneurs, the common denominator of that book, so I'll say that say the name again, for anyone who's listening. It's called don’t let death ruin your life. They listed every successful person who lost at least one parent under the age of 21. 

Chase: No shit, interesting. 

MaryRuth: Yeah, there's a huge, huge correlation, it is interesting. For all the listeners who haven't lost in immediate family member, the concept is that pain is really good. I agree. It opens you and I feel like it expands you, and it doesn't shrink you. And I think that it takes time, like you said, to really go through any painful situation. But that's another tagline. Like, I have these taglines that I like to say, like structure creates freedom, healing through repetition. Another one is just like loss of any kind it's expanding you it's not shrinking you. A lot of times stuff happens to people, even for any women listening, you know, miscarriages, people, they are shrinking, and they should expand throughout the process, but they shouldn't feel bad about going through those things it is tricky. It's tricky. It is. 

Chase: Easier said then done and on your own timeline on your own. 

MaryRuth: that is the key. It's not like, it's just can be comforting for people to hear that after they have gone through a process it will come maybe full circle. There's circuitry there. 

Chase: I agree. It took me 10 years. 

MaryRuth: Yes, exactly. I think also just with my story, I won't share too much. But I what I will share is a couple of the key things that did come full circle. So that people can think of their own process. Like they have some pain points, three, four pain points in their life, and then try to also feel for them, like how does that come full circle. And so for me, I'll just kind of say the short version chronologically. And then I'll just say on the flip side, how I how I can see how everything's always and that all of those things were pushing me ever forward. Forward is a huge, huge thing. I always say like move forward every day. So even I didn't know when you would share it ever forward came from your dad. But it all made sense to me more as you were talking. I was like, oh, of course. Because ever forward would it's not ever forward and move forward every day. People say bounce forward, fight forward. But you don't you don't always hear the people talking about these concepts. So I did wonder like, oh, ever forwards like so unique. In the book, I think I say something like the books dedicated to my mom who taught me how to move forward every day. 

Chase: oh, amazing. 

MaryRuth: So the bottom line was just, I had a few things in a short amount of time. That just led me where I am today, which is when I was 12 my dad passed away suddenly of a heart condition. He was an amazing athlete wrestled at Penn State. So strong so healthy my brother Daniel varsity baseball pitcher High School in New Jersey going to college to play college baseball. I last thing I ever saw him do was and it's meant to be I left college a day or two early don't know why for Easter break, drove home watching pitches varsity baseball game then I did like stuff I don't usually do like then I like instead of seeing my friends your home for the weekend for college, from college I went outside his locker room you know, waited for his friends then we like all drove to the restaurant. Then the guys were making fun of me because I was like putting lipstick all making fun of me the whole team. Everybody's in their uniforms. Then I go and I have dinner with them. You know, just like all those moments. 

Chase: those were the last moments you had with him if I am understanding correctly. Yeah

MaryRuth: Exactly. And then, you know then, but it was meant to be because I had been at college for so long and I got to see him. If I hadn't have had like that last and also wouldn't have been fair to my mom. Like she went away come up the next morning for another baseball game and she just screaming at the top of her lungs and I was there otherwise she would have been alone.

Chase: did he pass in his sleep?

MaryRuth: yeah

Chase: Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.

MaryRuth: And, you know, witnessing all that, you know, it's really like you live through she tried to do CPR it was it was just those things. They change your perspective forever; they change your life forever. And but looking back at even the way it unfolded, I felt like there was grace in there. And so then my mom, you know, it's a metaphysical thing you were talking about LA and all of all of that, she got two benign, my mom got two benign brain tumors. So some people say like, there's two, because it's her son and her husband's, you know, manifesting as like two. There's a lot to that a lot of people look at the body that way and different ailments in the body. And so I'm just gonna speed through this part really fast. It was amazing. She made a full recovery, even after she one of the surgeries with a top neurosurgeon at Columbia, left her kind of paralyzed on the left side of her body. We did all the nutrition stuff learned about all this stuff. And then she came out the other end. She's a CFO of my company. Again, we have 90 plus 90 employees at MaryRuth’s organics. There was a moment in there where Lehman Brothers crashed. I mean, Lehman Brothers went under and the housing market crashed, and my mom lost her business, which left us in $700,000 debt.

Chase: Say that number, say that number again. 

MaryRuth: $700,000 in debt. People say, well, like how, how could you have $700,000 in debt? Like, where does that come from? And people who have run companies know that it can come very fast. So I grew up very spoiled. My dad was a lawyer, my mom took over, he also had lumber yards on the side, she took over those lumber yards when he passed away. 300 employees like 90 million in revenue and again, housing market crashes, no one wants lumber, no one wants to build. She, I remember, she called me, like sold me something like, we only have $100,000 left for payroll. For hundreds of employees, for hundreds of employees but we basically liquidated the business in such a way that we took care of everyone. We did not file for bankruptcy with that. But it was so powerful for me to watch in my formative years in my 20s, you know, like building this business, destroying the business. So then on the flip side, eight years later, when I went to build MaryRuth’s organics, I made so many decisions that I didn't watch happen. So it's like even that pain points. And so she there were six locations. And at the end of the day, she had personally guaranteed a lot of stuff. And so that left us with that $700,000 in debt. And I went like, seven years, and I got out of that debt through my private practice through my clients and through launching our product line. And there was just like that tipping point where we were selling on Amazon, before Amazon was popular. And I mean, do you want me to say just a little, little bit about that? 

Chase: sure, yeah and this is, this is this has been great. A great way to cap the interview. So thank you so much for giving us this backstory.

MaryRuth: yeah, thank you. I will I'll just wrap up basically, because I think a lot of entrepreneurs might be listening and they would find the Amazon aspect really fascinating.

Chase: oh I'm always intrigued by it, but it's just like, Chase put down the shiny object. You don't need any more shiny objects. Okay. Like we were talking about earlier.  

MaryRuth: So, um, I remember when I was in a lot of debt, we because everyone in my private practice was doing Liquids till Lunch. Everyone would say, Oh, I'm taking a capsule, but the capsule makes me really nauseous. And so I thought, Okay, let me make a liquid vitamin B that has to be a liquid vitamin and then the capsule won't make you nauseous while you're doing like liquids till lunch. And so I called for six months like every manufacturer. Again, I was in a deficit. I didn't have money to do like 20,000 bottles of a custom blend type of thing. This was probably 2014 and this was before like Instagram and like everyone it was it was really different back then. So I found a manufacturer in California, and I said please, please I can only afford 90 bottles. Can you mix one small batch shipped into my apartment in New York City, which was 650 square feet. And I used to sleep on like this one mattress and my husband would like sleep on a mattress on the floor. And just like, I took those 90 bottles, and I sold them in my office, and we shipped like 20 to Amazon and without me asking or knowing some of my clients in my private practice reviewed the product on Amazon, and because it was sugar free, it made it in the algorithm to the first page on Amazon. And I want to say two other inspiring concepts about that before I just bring the whole story full circle. What's amazing is that I sold like the first day I cried so much I sold like two or $300 worth of vitamins. And I had been working privately with clients where it was 12 sessions in New York City for $2,860 for 12 sessions. And I would sign up like 20 people a day, I had to pay, I was in a debt management program, I had to pay like almost 40 with all with my mom's apartment, my apartment and my office apartment plus the debt management, I had to make like 40 or $50,000 a month. And my husband when I got married to him only had $5,000. And he wasn't really working at the time. So like a lot of pressures. That's why it took me a long time to get out of $700,000. But I kind of did what we spoke about, like, I had a routine, I executed this like self-care routine. I knew all these micro actions, you know going to bed early or saying no to that cocktail would allow me micro action to get out of this macro problem $700,000 in debt. And I saw that those vitamins sell. And then every year they sold a little more. And I kept doing my clients and everything. And eventually, there was like a tipping point when there was a moment when we were out of debt, which was insane. I was I was still, I have four children. And in 2016, I was still in debt when I was pregnant with my first child. And it was like, there's like this moment when like we finally got out of debt. And then I had my first child, but like, like literally, you know. And so and we did all those things that are great where we didn't hire employees for a long time in my business, we use any profit that we had to make a new product instead of hire an assistant. All of those like little things. And today, like I said, we have 90 employees. And currently I own 100% of my business. I took no outside funding; I came from a negative $700,000 deficit. And the closing comment of like all of that stuff we're talking about, like all the pain points that people have, how can they bring it full circle. The final closing comment I have Chase is the most impactful personal decision that I made throughout that process of getting out of debt was one choice that pushed my whole life forward. So you take all the things we just spoke about. A lot of those things I didn't have any control over. Remember we said like things happening, you have no control over. There was one thing and that story, the founding story of MaryRuth’s organics, my company where I had so much freewill, that it changed everything. And it was the hardest decision I made. And very quickly it's like this, I had a moment where in our group of friends when I was dating my current husband Dave in and I was so in love with him and again only had $5,000 to his name, bless his heart. There was a moment in our group of friends when there was someone we all know all our friends we all knew this guy. He's a finance guy really, really wants to marry me basically like the bottom line. So there's this moment he has millions of dollars where IE I just go over here, and I'm not saying anything negative about him, it was like the bottom line was like a lot of people would have been like, also the debt wasn't really my mom’s debt, it was kind of my mom's debt from the you know, all these where they just go You know what, I'll just go over here. And something told me like, No, I'm not just gonna go over here and make my debt go away like this. I'm going to kind of we talked about before be the cause of my own life. And to deal with this I can deal with this. I don't need help from anyone. And I chose to marry the person that I really love. I love him so much. Today we have a four year old two and a half year old, two twins, right that are seven months old. And if I had this is so powerful for anyone who's listening, especially if you are female in this world where there's just so much social pressure, I stayed true to my heart, which is the hardest thing to do. I married David and if I had not done that, then I would have I wouldn't be here with you on this podcast at all. I would have no company. No product line. No mission driven business, no 90 employees, no passion, no purpose, no book, no impact. And I feel that that is not just like, oh, look what I did. It's not about me at all. It's just to share the story so that anyone who's listening in is going through a tough time, like I have a decision to make. This is such a clear path. My problem will go away in two seconds, instant gratification or long term fulfillment. That was single handedly the one decision I made in the last 10 years that I felt was the self-awareness decision, right? Like, what do you I had so enough self-awareness to be like this is wrong for me. And this is right for me. And the patience and perseverance to execute my daily routine for like seven years and come out the other end. And if I can do it, literally anyone can do it. Because that's all it was. It was just hard work and staying true to myself.

Chase: well, I think you kind of just gave us the final answer to the final question. But let me ask you directly, please. And thank you so much for sharing your story. This has been incredible. Ever forward when you hear those two words, having relived all of that just now again, thank you again for sharing and kind of me sharing the origin of it all like how does that fall on you? What does that mean to you today?

MaryRuth: This is so powerful and I do feel that I was meant to meet you and to come on that ever forward podcast I truly believe that the only key to happiness is that you move forward. So everyone wants to just stay getting like the comfort zone. And I think that once you're in there, right? Let's say I go with this guy, I get rid of the debt now I'm in the comfort zone. My soul what my soul wants is to go forward. And so ever forward just means for me move forward ever forward. And those things for each individual person happiness lies only in moving forward.

Chase: There's never a right or wrong answer. I would say at the end of that, like I really like I appreciate your response. It's been great having you on the show. Thank you again. I will have all of the information for MaryRuth's organics and the new book liquids till lunch down in the show notes and video notes for everybody to check out you want to you want to you want to get into this stuff. Again, thank you so much. You brought me over like a smorgasbord of so many great new ways for me to try. So MaryRuth thank you. 

MaryRuth: Thank you, Chase.